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Tuesday, August 08, 2006

(Gibson)

TOP TEN MOVIES MEL GIBSON WILL NEVER MAKE:

#10 - Manischewitz Sunrise
Nick Frescawitz gets the toughest assignment of his career when he's required to bring in his old cheder buddy, now a drug dealer who is trying to go straight.

#9 - What Jewish Women Want
Gibson plays a high-flying chauvinistic executive who experiences a rude awakening when a freak accident gives him the ability to hear Jewish women's thoughts.

#8 - MAD DOG 20/20 MAX 4: The Pacific Coast Highway Warrior
Max lends his aid to a small band of survivors in post-apocalyptic California who are trying to transport a tanker truck full of precious fortified wine while being attacked by a band of savage, sober mohawked marauders.

#7 - Beard On A Wire
Rick Jarmstein put a drug dealer behind bars. The Witness Protection Program moved him around and hid his identity. Now they have him posing as a Hasidic Jew in Detroit, but his cover is blown when a former girlfriend (Goldie Hawn) insists that he shave, at about the same time that the now-released drug dealer has caught up to him.

#6 - Lethal Kippah
Gibson and the Rabbi Schmuley Boteach are teamed as partners in a talmud-charged buddy comedy involving a massive international lox smuggling ring.

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#5 - Maverickberg
Bret Maverickberg, charming Old West gambler, is back, and out to compete in the Three Rivers Dreidel Championship, but he's got one small problem: It's nearly impossible to find a decent deli in the backwater town.

#4 - Sefirot Signs
Things go awry when Gibson and his brother discover a pattern of perfectly carved crop circles left the night before by extraterrestrials who are trying to study Kabbalah.

#3 - The Man Without A Foreskin
After he fails an important exam, a young mekkubal enlists the help of the mysterious and reclusive man whose penile disfigurement is the source of constant town gossip. As the two prepare for the Zohar exam, they forge an unlikely friendship.

#2 - Kosher Chicken Run
A group of kosher chickens plan to escape their prisonlike coop. When the sinister shochet Mrs. Traibor decides to use the hens as the main ingredient in glatt chicken pot pies, Saul, an American rooster (voiced by Gibson) promises to teach the chickens how to pose as neveila.

#1 - BritHeart
In a time of chaos, Mohel Wallace gathers and motivates an amateur but passionately rebellious circumcision army.

by markjamesmurphy 08/09/06

5 Comments:

Blogger House of Suz said...

Cute! You should pitch these to a studio.

9:48 AM  
Blogger Variant E said...

Cool. Will they be available as a box set? You could call it "Gibson's List"

7:04 PM  
Blogger markjamesmurphy said...

hehe how about Tippler's List

8:03 PM  
Blogger Charles said...

LOL!!!!

2:37 PM  
Blogger The GeekZine said...

GEEK WARS- EPISODE 25: Show Me the Crazy- Tom Cruise vs. Mel Gibson.

Come join in on the fun!

4:58 AM  

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